


A pinky promise means something (when it's with your soulmate)

by camichats



Series: Colors, Soulmates, and other things Bucky can't live without [1]
Category: Marvel
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, First Kiss, Iron Man 1, M/M, Minor Violence, Pre-Iron Man 1, Soulmates, Time Skips, Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-07
Updated: 2017-07-08
Packaged: 2018-11-28 23:21:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,514
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11428377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/camichats/pseuds/camichats
Summary: The Soldier can suddenly see colors and asks the child in front of him what that means. He has to leave, but promises to come back. The promise somehow survives the wipes.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The bulk of this story is Pre-Iron Man 1, with a short epilogue as chapter 2 to deal with the kidnapping in Afghanistan.
> 
> Edit: Due to popular demand, this is now a series! But because I didn't plan anything, tell me what kind of content you want to see.

The Soldier ran silently through the mansion. He had the floor plans memorized and knew he was nearing the chosen exit point, when he nearly barreled into a small child. Only his enhanced reflexes saved the boy from being more than clipped, but the Soldier couldn’t keep running in case the child told an adult. _Do not be seen_ was part of his orders, but now that he had been seen… The target had been killed to look like an accident; the Soldier couldn’t kill this one without raising suspicion. The child was young enough that no one would believe him, but if the Soldier scared him his mother might decide to humor him and tell someone else to search. Not a risk the Soldier could take. Talk to him, convince him not to worry about seeing the Soldier, leave.

The child was, in a word, adorable. The Soldier never thought it would be a word that would have any use to him, but here the kid was, wavy, messy hair only serving to emphasize his doe eyes as he stared up at the Soldier.

The Soldier’s heart beat louder, and he knew that he would do anything to protect this child. He glanced behind himself; no one was coming. He moved to the side where there were more shadows, his shoulder brushing against the wall as he knelt down, and motioned for the boy to join him.

He stared at the Soldier’s exposed metal hand, transfixed, before smiling widely and scrambling towards him. “What metal is this? How far up does it go? Does it hurt?” he questioned in a hushed voice, immediately reaching for the Soldier’s hand. The Soldier let him.

It was only because of his training that he didn’t gasp as a rush of colors hit him-- muted in the dark of the hall-- but the child had no such inhibition.

He looked at the Soldier with wide brown-- _brown_ \-- eyes, looking excited and overjoyed.

The Soldier did not understand. “What happened?”

“We’re soulmates.”

The Soldier frowned. Soulmates were not part of his training.

“Can you see colors now?”

He nodded, but because he wanted to, not because it was expected of him.

“It’s because we touched. So we’re soulmates.” The boy said it so matter-of-factly that the Soldier believed him. What reason would he have to lie?

“What do soulmates do?” The Soldier didn’t have orders, there was no soulmate mission to complete; he needed help, a direction, and the boy looked like he could provide it.

“They take care of each other.”

It coincided with the protective urge the Soldier had felt earlier, so he nodded again. “Don’t tell anyone about me.”

The child immediately looked hurt and let go of the Soldier’s hand. The Soldier did not think about why that pained him. “Why?”

“It’s not safe for you.”

The child pouted, sticking out his bottom lip. “I can take care of myself.”

The Soldier knew that to be false, but instead he said, “ _I_ can’t take care of myself, myshka, and I don’t want you to do it for me.”

“My name’s Tony not… whatever you just said.” Tony scuffed his barefoot against the floor. “Fine, I won’t tell.”

Without knowing why, the Soldier held his metal hand out sideways in a loose fist with his pinky extended. Tony must have known the meaning because he linked his pinky with the Soldier’s. The Soldier had never wished for a heat sensor in his arm more than he did in that moment.

“We’ll see each other again,” he promised. Once he got a confirming nod from Tony, he stood swiftly and made his way to the exit point. The Soldier only allowed himself one backwards glance before Tony was out of sight from a turned corner.

Instead of the usual calm and mild satisfaction the Soldier felt at the end of a successful mission, he was itching to go back to the mansion, to Tony. He didn’t, only because he knew the danger he’d be putting Tony in if he did. He’d never cared about something like this before; soulmates must be very special.

The Soldier was determined to keep his promise.

* * *

The Soldier was wiped. The Soldier had colors.

None of his handlers asked, and he did not report it-- seeing in color was not a malfunction.

He disobeyed orders. He was wiped.

He remembered events from before the wipe. He hid it when possible but was still wiped more frequently.

* * *

The Soldier recognized the target. Not for the man himself, though he did know him from an earlier mission, but because of his son.

_Soulmate_ , the Soldier’s mind provided, _the reason for the colors_.

Anthony Stark, age seventeen, currently attending MIT, will not be accompanying the target, leave alive if seen. Internally, the Soldier sneered at the phrase ‘leave alive’, but he kept his face expressionless as he read through the file. Orders: Eliminate Howard Stark. Details: Make it appear as an accident. Additional casualties are acceptable. Do not be seen.

“Orders confirmed,” he said, and the lie was not seen this time.

Only three handlers were sent on the mission, and he killed them after they reported in. The Soldier pried open the control panel for his arm with a knife, then pressed the button to opened it fully so he could cut the three trackers out and threw them inside a train before he stole a car several miles away.

His left arm was… functional in the most crude of ways: the fine motor skill was trashed, he couldn’t grip anything, and the reaction time was delayed. He covered it with a hoodie and glove but was forced to rely on his right arm to put them on.

The Soldier switched cars twice before reaching his destination. Tony was in an engineering lab that was child’s play to break into. Even though it worked in the Soldier’s favor, he was upset at how easy it would be for someone to harm Tony.

Tony was hunched over an eclectic mess of metal and papers that seemed to make sense to him, dressed in a bright red t-shirt. Surveying the room, he noticed that many objects had a rich color to them, neither clashing nor precisely going together-- Tony probably chose them, then. Tony didn’t notice his presence, loud rock music filling the room and silencing anything he might have heard otherwise. The Soldier found the stereo and turned down the volume. Tony’s head snapped up, ready to complain at whoever turned down his music, but he froze with his mouth half open.

The Soldier tugged off the glove in the hopes that Tony would recognize it and remember him (it had been his focus the first time they met, after all). He hadn’t thought this through Tony had been _so small_ when they met and the Soldier hadn’t had contact with him since he wouldn’t remember--

“It’s you,” he whispered, a grin overtaking his face. Tony carelessly tossed his pencil on the table and strode over to the Soldier, throwing his arms around the Soldier’s middle. “You know,” he said conversationally, face pressed into the hoodie the Soldier had stolen, “I half-thought I dreamt you up more than once. I mean, _come on_ , a guy with a bitchin’ metal arm, my soulmate? It would’ve been a dream come true! Then of course I’d remember that no one else _could_ be my soulmate, but still, having one memory from a night over a decade ago isn’t exactly solid evidence when he’s gone awol.”

The Soldier finally raised his right arm to hug Tony back, feeling much warmer than was proportional to the body heat Tony was giving off. “I can’t stay.”

“Yes you can,” Tony said, nuzzling his face in the Soldier’s chest which made his heart try its best to beat out of his chest. “No offense babe, but you stink.” Despite his words, he didn’t move. “I say we go back to my apartment so you can shower and then we can eat and cuddle. No objections? Excellent.” He linked his arm with the Soldier’s and started to walk away but stopped when he heard the arm grinding as the Soldier tried to move it. Tony narrowed his eyes at the covered limb, then at the Soldier’s face. “Off with the hoodie, Skywalker.”

The Soldier didn’t know who ‘Skywalker’ was, or what it was supposed to mean, but he managed to get out of the piece of clothing without incident.

Tony tapped his fingers against his own chest. “I don’t think it should’ve made that noise. Would it be too much to ask if I can have a look at it? Or perhaps an explanation? Because my tech senses are telling me all is not right in this baby.”

“There were trackers.”

“And you…?”

“Cut them out,” the Soldier said, not understanding why Tony paled, but he added, “I couldn’t lead them to you.”

“Does it hurt?”

The Soldier didn’t answer. It always hurt.

“Can I look at it?” He nodded and Tony steered him to the workbench where he’d been sitting earlier. “I haven’t seen any prosthetic this high tech before, but I might be able to figure out enough that it’ll at least stop hurting. Hopefully. I am a genius, after all, but I think I’ll have to give up the title if I can’t get this. What’s your name?” he asked, settling in front of him.

The Soldier opened his mouth to answer. Then closed it. The Soldier knew that he had a designation in ‘Asset’, but no name. ‘Soldier’ would be the best answer he could give at present, but how would Tony respond to that?

“Okay, uh, nickname? Title? Rank? You gotta give me something or I’ll just come up with one on my own and I have it on good authority-- well, Rhodey, but I think he counts-- good authority that you won’t like it.” He raised an eyebrow when the Soldier didn’t answer. “Alright then. Well, Sweetheart I’m going to open this, it looks like a control panel maybe? Ah! Yes. Okay and so _this_ would be- _aha_!” Tony hummed as he peered at the complex network of wires. “Well here,” Tony pointed at a spot in the Soldier’s upper arm, “looks like a spot where a tracker went?” He looked at the Soldier for confirmation and received a nod. He nodded back, a pleased smile on his face and the Soldier could feel his own expression soften in response. Tony found the previous positions of the other two trackers-- one in the elbow and one in the wrist-- and directed the Soldier’s attention to a few wires in his wrist. “You must’ve nicked them when you took out the tracker.” Tony leaned in, his face mere inches away from the area. “Looks like that was the point, everything here is too tight to have gotten it out safely.”

The Soldier nodded even though he was looking at Tony and not the inside of his arm.

“Thaaat’s all the good news I have, I’m afraid.” Tony made an apologetic face at him. “I don’t have any wire coverings here, so I can’t do anything about the pain, and I _really_ don’t have any replacements.”

“It’s okay,” the Soldier reassured him, but it had no effect. On instinct, he reached his right hand out and placed it on Tony’s hanging head, running his fingers through the soft brown hair there.

“Are you petting me?”

The Soldier froze. He thought it might help- he started pulling his hand away. “Sorry.” Maybe those returning instincts he thought he had weren’t as good as he’d thought. They’d been working up to now, but his luck had to run out at some point.

Tony caught his hand and looked at the Soldier like he was a puzzle to be solved. “No it’s- it was nice, I just wasn’t expecting it.” He gave a smile that the Soldier immediately marked as fake. He hated it.

The Soldier pulled his hand free and shoved it under his leg. “Sorry,” he repeated.

Tony didn’t move for a minute, and if the Soldier had been looking at him he would’ve seen how lost he looked. Tony closed up the Soldier’s arm and they sat in silence, Tony fidgeting. “Last time we met you were really nice and then you just took off. Are you going to leave again?” he blurted.

The Soldier looked at him, then nodded regretfully. “Tomorrow.”

Tony chewed on his lip, wanting to argue, to convince him to stay longer. The Soldier’s eyes were drawn to it, and he felt warm in a way that was familiar but he couldn’t remember a name for. His right hand automatically reached out to soothe the abused flesh, and Tony let out a soft “Oh,” when the Soldier’s thumb rested against his bottom lip. Tony looked at him and, keeping eye contact, put his fingers loosely around the Soldier’s wrist to keep him in place, then turned his head to kiss his thumb.

He felt heat rising in his face and wanted to look away but was transfixed with the way Tony was looking at him-- with longing and softness. Tony held the Soldier’s hand in his own and lowered them, then cleared his throat. “So this can be a come-on if you want it to be, but otherwise it’s a completely innocent offer. Do you want to come back to my apartment? Like I said earlier, there’s a shower and food, those wire coverings for your arm, and, you know, me, if that helps at all.”

“Okay,” the Soldier agreed.

Tony did a double take, then smiled in such a way that made the Soldier’s heart beat louder in his chest. “Okay,” Tony echoed. “Great.” He started putting away tools and talked a mile a minute, mostly about things the Soldier didn’t understand but tried his best to. The walk was technically uneventful-- no one followed them, there were no threats-- but the Soldier felt this was the best day of his life, including all the memories he knew he should have but didn’t.

It wasn’t until they were outside Tony’s apartment, the door unlocked and open, that the Soldier thought he shouldn’t be here. He stared at the entrance with trepidation, not moving from where he was standing.

“Sweetheart?” Tony asked, a concerned frown marring his features. “You okay?”

“I’m supposed to kill your father.”

Tony froze in shock, his mouth hanging open slightly. “Um.” He laughed nervously. “So this might not be any of my business, but are you planning on going through with it?”

The Soldier shook his head. “If he died, it would hurt you.”

“That’s… okay- that’s not the best morality, but I’ll take it. Did you want to come in?”

He took a preemptive step back as if it wouldn’t hurt as much when Tony told him to leave if he did. “I’ve killed people, Tony. Dozens.” _Maybe hundreds_.

Tony swallowed. “Did you like doing it?” He shook his head without hesitating, which seemed to make Tony feel better. He smiled comfortingly and beckoned the Soldier towards him.

He didn’t move for a moment, then haltingly entered the apartment. He stood awkwardly, glancing at his surroundings, not sure where to stand or what to do. He was used to acting without orders after years of practice, but this was distressing in an entirely new way. Tony really seemed to like the color red, which made him feel better about the red star painted on his shoulder.

“Okay, so the bathroom’s this way,” Tony said, the Soldier following him as they walked through his bedroom. The Soldier noted that, like the living room, it was scattered with blueprints, half-finished models, spare parts, and various tools, most of which he didn’t recognize and definitely couldn’t name. Tony pushed back the curtain. “You can use whatever you want and stay as long as you like.” Tony bit his lip like he hadn’t meant to say that but didn’t take it back. “Uh I’ll just,” he gestured to the Soldier’s body, “try to find something that’ll fit you.”

The Soldier stripped and stepped inside, hand hovering over the knob for hot water before cranking it up, sighing in contentment when the warm water fell over him. He would’ve liked to spend hours relaxing in there, but he had to leave tomorrow morning and he wanted as much time with Tony as he could get, so he rushed, mourning the possibility for a brief moment.

He was accustomed to cleaning quickly, and as such was out of the shower by the time Tony came back with clothes for him. Tony’s entire face turned red, and he avoided looking at the Soldier. The Soldier caught his hand before he could leave, a frown furrowing his brow. “Are you hurt?”

“What?” Tony asked, finally looking at him with such honest confusion showing that it soothed the Soldier’s worries more than the following answer of, “No.”

“You’re uncomfortable,” he observed.

Tony cleared his throat, looking away again. “Well, you _are_ naked, and gorgeous to boot, and then there’s _me_ , so uh yeah. I wouldn’t exactly say ‘uncomfortable’ but it’s something in that area for sure, Sweetheart.”

Oh. The Soldier gently tugged Tony close to him so there were only a couple inches between them. He didn’t consciously lower his voice, but it felt right when he whispered, “You said it could be a come-on if I wanted it to be, darlin’.”

“I didn’t think you’d actually take me up on it!” he squeaked.

The Soldier pinked, releasing Tony and stepping back. “Sorry,” he mumbled. Maybe he should stop acting on his budding instincts around Tony; they only led him astray.

“I- no, I just- um,” Tony stammered. He set the clothes he was holding on the counter and moved back to the doorway. “I’ll work on your arm when you’re done.” He moved as if to leave but jerked to a stop and turned back to the Soldier, hands fidgeting. “I definitely want to, Sweetheart, but I don’t want you to think that you have to.” He left before the Soldier could correct him.

He frowned at the closed door for a minute before getting dressed. Tony didn’t notice him when he walked in the living room, so he took the opportunity to hug him from behind. Tony jumped in surprise but relaxed almost immediately into him. The Soldier was bigger than him, neatly enveloping Tony in his embrace, and it was then that something occurred to him, something that he should’ve thought of earlier. “How old are you?”

“Seventeen.”

The Soldier huffed a small laugh, then buried his nose in Tony’s hair. “You really shouldn’t have offered sex, Tony.”

“Aw c’mon we’re soulmates.”

“You’re underage.”

“Barely.”

“‘Barely’ of age doesn’t apply to statutory rape.”

“The age of consent in Massachusetts is sixteen, so _really_ I’m overage.”

“I’m not going to have sex with you and then leave the next day.”

“So stay.”

The Soldier wanted to, but, “It’s not safe. The people I- work for can’t know about you.”

Tony noted his abrupt pause around ‘work’ and filed it away to analyze later. The way he said it made it sound like he wasn’t choosing to be there, and Tony would be damned if he left his soulmate there. He turned around in the ring of the Soldier’s arms to face him without breaking the hug. “I could help you, you know. I mean, I’m not of age yet, yeah, but I’m still a Stark and a genius, if you give me somewhere to start, I’m sure I could help, at least a little.”

The Soldier sighed, nuzzling him to take the sting out of his reply. “Too dangerous.” He kissed Tony’s head.

“I’ll be careful,” Tony pleaded.

He didn’t say anything because there was nothing more to say. It _was_ too dangerous, and there was nothing either of them could do to change that.

Tony seemed to understand because he sagged in the Soldier’s arms. “I don’t want it to be another eleven years before I see you again.”

“It won’t be,” he promised.

Tony held up his hand, pinky out and the rest in a loose fist-- the same gesture from the last time they saw each other. The Soldier looped his pinky with Tony’s and kissed his head again. Tony swallowed loudly, then stepped back. “I can look at your arm now.”

Tony didn’t give himself enough credit, the Soldier thought. Then again, Tony had been surprised that he even had the correct parts, so maybe it wasn’t that strange. He blushed when the Soldier thanked him, which was a pleasant sight but made him worry about how the other people in Tony’s life were treating him. When asked, Tony smiled and told him about Rhodey, his closest (and only) friend.

They talked-- Tony more than the Soldier-- ate, cuddled, and went to bed together. The Soldier was remembering more and more from the proximity to his soulmate but nothing specific. It made him feel more human (and it helped him realize that it wasn’t his instincts that were off, it was that he wasn’t accustomed to interacting with someone like Tony).

The Soldier woke with his arms full of Tony, and all he could think was that he didn’t want to leave. If it weren’t for Hydra… but they did exist, and they _would_ be coming for him. He held Tony flush with his body and breathed him in. He should leave before Tony wakes so they wouldn’t have to say goodbye. He wouldn’t have to look Tony in the eye and choose, again, to leave. ...But he didn’t want Tony to wake up alone. The decision settled deep in him, and he closed his eyes, determined to sear this moment into his brain.

When he woke again, it was to his erection pressed rubbing against Tony. He put his hand on Tony’s hip and moved his own lower body away.

Tony, having the best/worst timing possible, stirred awake. “Sweetheart?” he asked, voice rough from sleep. It made the Soldier shudder, and Tony felt it. “You okay?”

“Yeah.” He cleared his throat. “Sorry.” He muttered something about going to the bathroom and left before Tony could be awake enough to notice the Soldier’s (inappropriate) arousal. It didn’t take long to take care of, but he knew it was obvious what he’d been doing. He mentally shrugged; Tony already knew he wanted to, having confirmation wouldn’t change anything.

Tony was still wrapped up in blankets on the bed. He blinked blearily at the Soldier-- who had stopped to stare because Tony was plain _adorable_ like this-- and proceeded to pout at him. “It’s too early to be up.” He made grabby hands and increased his pout when the Soldier only smiled and didn’t move forward.

“Do you know the time to judge it as ‘too early’?”

“Is the sun up? Yes? Too early! Come onnn Sweetheart, shouldn’t you be humoring me since you’re leaving me all alone to die?”

“You’re not going to die,” he growled.

Tony dropped the dramatics and shuffled the Soldier’s reaction to the back of his mind to think about later with a few other things he’d noticed. “That doesn’t mean we can’t spend all day cuddling in bed.”

“You have to eat.”

“And you don’t?” Tony meant it rhetorically, but then the Soldier’s expression held steady and he found himself genuinely wondering. He narrowed his eyes suspiciously. “You _do_ have to eat right? Being able to go longer without food than me doesn’t count.”

The Soldier rolled his eyes. “Yes, I eat.”

“D’you want to go out for breakfast? There’s this cafe down the road that has the best blueberry muffins in the city.”

“We shouldn’t be seen together,” the Soldier said, grimacing apologetically. “I shouldn’t be seen in this area either, to be safe.”

“Are you sure you won’t tell me about this mystery work of your’s? Okay, that’s a no,” he said in response to the Soldier’s immediate, severe expression. “How do you like donuts? There are a few places around here that deliver. They probably make a killing from college students with that.”

Tony gave the Soldier a dubious look when he told him how much he ate, but ordered a few dozen donuts all the same. The Soldier knew he’d had donuts before Hydra, but they’d been plain, no filling or chocolate covered, or sprinkles. He frowned at the bright, varied colors that made up sprinkles, wondering why they did it when Tony informed him kids liked sprinkles the most. “They can’t see the colors, though.”

Tony shrugged. “I could, it’s the reason _I_ like sprinkles.” He pinched loose sprinkles in the box between his fingers and dropped them in his mouth.

“Most people don’t meet their soulmate until they’re adults,” he pointed out.

Tony shrugged. “Yeah but adults don’t want concentrated sugar shit on their donuts, kids do.”

He shook his head, then proceeded to eat his way through two dozen glazed before he stopped, licking the excess glaze from his fingers while looking at Tony methodically. His lips were tinted blue from the blueberry filled donuts he’d eaten, and his fingers were stained a rainbow from sprinkles, but more than anything, he looked happy even though they hadn’t done anything special together. “Can I kiss you?”

Tony perked up and nodded, reaching out to help pull the Soldier to him. The Soldier knelt in front of Tony, preferring to lean up a little to reach him, than be standing and have to bend in half. Warmth bloomed in the Soldier’s chest when their lips met, but he couldn’t help a chuckle when he pulled back and their lips stuck together a bit from the sugar.

Tony caught the Soldier’s bottom lip in his mouth and sucked on it. “Had to get the sugar off,” he said breathlessly.

“You ain’t fooling anyone, solnyshko.”

Tony kissed him. “I wasn’t particularly trying to, and you _did_ need to get that sugar off your mouth. You know, you can call me names in English, Sweetheart.”

“Could,” the Soldier confirmed, kissed him, then said, “won’t. Well,” he amended, “not exclusively.”

Tony tilted his head, looking at the Soldier while he tried to remember something. “You called me something. Before, when we first met,” he clarified.

He nodded, kissed Tony again.

“What was it?”

The Soldier smiled enigmatically, knowing Tony would kick up a fuss over being called a little mouse. He kissed him one last time and stood up. “I should go,” he said, flesh hand still cupping Tony’s face.

Some of the happiness visibly left Tony. “Okay.”

Neither of them moved.

“Will you call me? If I give you my number, will you call me?”

“Yes,” he said immediately, bringing a short-lived smile to Tony’s face.

Tony kissed his hand, then got up to write it down. He held the scrap of paper out, looking for all the world like he would rather weld his hand to the Soldier’s than let him leave, but he did, sharing a lingering kiss in front of the door.

The Soldier hated how sad Tony looked as he left, but with every step, he reminded himself that this wasn’t permanent, that he was coming back, and that he wasn’t dropping out of contact completely. He’d eviscerate Hydra, but not because of what they did to him. He wanted the freedom to be with his soulmate, and no bullshit Nazi organization was going to stop him.

* * *

He knew he wasn’t the Soldier anymore, but he didn’t remember his name. He had glimpses sometimes, where he saw a memory overlay with the world around him. Most of them were as his time as the Winter Soldier, but his… civilian memories featured a blond at different stages of his life. He must’ve been a friend, and he got the feeling that when he remembered everything he’d have to mourn his death.

He wanted to be with Tony, but it wouldn’t be safe until Hydra was weaker so he found bases and killed everyone he found. It took a month before he cracked and called the number Tony had given him. The paper the number was written on was worn from all the times he had stared at it, mesmerized by Tony’s handwriting, the fact that he’d held it. Before he’d decided to call, it was all he had of his soulmate.

“Hello?”

“Tony,” he breathed out in relief. He hadn’t realized how tense he was until suddenly it was gone. “It’s… um.”

Before he could panic over the fact that he didn’t have a name to identify himself, Tony said, “Sweetheart?”

“Yeah.”

“Hey,” he said, smile audible. “I’m glad you called. I mean, it’s been a month, and whatever it is you’re doing is dangerous so. Uh, yeah. I’m glad you called,” he repeated.

He chuckled into the line, able to clearly visualize the way Tony looked: cheeks pink, and brown eyes downcast in embarrassment at not being able to find the right words. God but he wanted to hold him; he could feel his arms ache in need and wasn’t that ridiculous? He’d spent all of eight waking hours with him. “I’m glad you picked up,” he countered, teasing. His voice turned soft when he said, “It’s good to hear your voice.”

“You too,” Tony said warmly. “So, not that I’m complaining-- because I definitely am _not_ \-- but was there something you needed? Taking me up on that help I offered perhaps?”

“No.”

Tony sighed heavily. “I know you want to keep me safe, but c’mon there has to be something I can do!”

“Tony.”

“Believe it or not, Sweetheart, I know my way around a computer. I could get you information you need?”

He thought of the man from his memories. If Tony helped him with that, he might learn who he was quicker, and surely giving Tony a name or two for missions couldn’t hurt… “Once I know what I’m asking for,” he allowed, “I’ll tell you.”

“Really?” Tony asked, surprised. He clearly hadn’t been expecting to win.

He chuckled. “As long as you’re careful, solnyshko.”

Tony scoffed. “Please, I’m always careful.”

“I think you’re lying, but since you’re my soulmate, I’m willing to let it go.”

Tony laughed, and he felt like the world was brighter for it.


	2. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the start of Iron Man, so it's happening like 15 years after the last chapter ended.

Bucky had just finished up another mission and was looking forward to going back home. He missed Malibu and, more importantly, Tony. For a few years, Bucky had spent most of his time fighting Hydra, taking breaks to visit Tony, but he couldn’t be happier at the reverse it had taken.

His phone vibrated in his pocket, and he smiled when he saw the message was from Tony.

_I think you were right about Afghanistan Bucky-babe._

He frowned down at the words, unease churning in his gut. Bucky had asked Tony not to go; between US involvement and the various terrorist groups that were active, he’d thought it was too dangerous. Not even Hydra wanted to deal with that mess right now, what cells they had in the country had been downsized to skeleton crews for years, deemed too unstable to be of present use.

If Tony was saying he was right, then something happened. He stared at the phone for five minutes, willing a follow-up message to appear. When none did, he swallowed, closing his eyes tightly, praying that when he opened them, the colors would be the same as they always had. He peeked through his lashes, eyes catching on the gaudy red of his phone case, and breathed a sigh of relief. It was as vibrant as ever. He looked up, and the sky was the same shade of light blue-- Tony was still alive.

* * *

“Tony’s missing,” Pepper said as soon as he answered the call.

Bucky’s chest felt tight with the confirmation. “He’s alive,” he said, as much to comfort Pepper as to remind himself.

He heard her breathe out shakily over the line. “Good. Jim’s going to look for him, so make sure you communicate with him.” She rattled off a location. “That’s where the convoy was when they were attacked. I’m sending all the information I have to your phone. Bucky… keep me updated?”

“Of course, Pepper, and thank you.” He paused. “Keep an eye on Stane for me, would you? When you’re not too busy?” She was always busy, he knew, but Bucky really didn’t trust that man.

Pepper knew that and asked, “Do you think he was involved?”

“He has the most to gain if something happens to Tony. Just- be careful. If he was involved, he won’t hesitate to hurt you if he thinks you’re suspicious.”

“I will be. I would say the same to you, but I’d like to think I know better by now.”

He smiled. “Love you too, Pep.”

The good news was that he was in Punjab and had arranged passage soon after Tony’s text, so he was able to start immediately after arriving. The bad news was everything else. Especially when, two months in, Rhodey said they were trying to force him to stop searching.

“We don’t have any proof, and they don’t think he would have survived this long.”

Bucky clenched his jaw. He was _so close_ to finding Tony, he could feel it. “Tell them he has a soulmate. Tell them all about me, I don’t care, but I need you out here or I won’t be able to get him safe.”

“Tony would kill me,” he said, but it was a token protest.

“He’d be around to try.”

Rhodey sent him an email a few hours later:

_Pretty sure they think I’m Tony’s soulmate, but they haven’t come out and asked yet. I can keep looking._

Pepper contacted him several days later, saying that she found evidence of Stane’s involvement and other crimes, more than enough to put him away for the rest of his life. Bucky told her in no uncertain terms to keep her head down and act like she didn’t know anything until he got back. She wasn’t happy about it, but agreed-- illegal arms deals and homicide weren’t something she was equipped to handle.

* * *

Bucky shouldn’t have been surprised when, halfway through his slaughtering of the Ten Rings, Tony came out to meet him. In a metal suit. That he built. In a cave. While kidnapped. There was something viscerally pleasing about seeing Tony blow them all away, even more so than doing it himself.

“I’m going to destroy these weapons,” Tony said, voice hard, like he expected Bucky to fight him on it.

“Go for it, babe. Let’s get out of range first though, okay?”

While Tony was busy destroying his demons, Bucky tapped out two messages, one to Pepper, and one to Rhodey. The first was simply _Found him_ , and the second gave their location. Bucky may have walked here, but he had no intention of making his unenhanced boyfriend who had been held captive for three months endure that.

When Tony was done, yet made no move to take off the armor, Bucky knocked his metal hand on the faceplate, smiling lightly, like he wasn’t dying to see him. “This thing come off? I kinda wanna see my fella, he’s real handsome.”

Slowly, Tony reached up and took off the helmet, dropping it in the sand, tears running down his face. “You came for me.”

Bucky felt his heart break a little, for ever making Tony think he wouldn’t. He reached up with his flesh hand and cupped Tony’s face, Tony leaning heavily into it. “And I always will,” he said thickly, swallowing, “I did pinky promise, you know.”

Tony laughed brokenly. “You did. Help me get this thing off so I can hug my fiancé.”

Bucky did, touching every exposed piece of Tony as it happened, and kissing him every few seconds. “It’s not legal yet.”

“It will be,” Tony said, desperation coloring his tone more than his usual determination like every other time they’d had this exchange.

“It will be,” Bucky agreed. Silently, Bucky held out one of his hands for a pinky promise. Tony returned it, then grabbed his hand and held it close to his own chest. “Rhodey’s on his way. And everyone might know you have a soulmate. And… Stane was behind this.” Tony nodded, unsurprised. “You knew?”

He shook his head. “I stopped doubting you. You didn’t like me coming to Afghanistan and you didn’t like him. It added up, you know?”

Bucky wrapped him in a hug from behind. “You shouldn’t have to deal with any of it for a while. Pepper’s been taking care of everything, and I can help her once we’re back. Keep her safe and all.”

Tony hummed, relaxing back into him.

“Solnyshko, you wanna tell me what’s in your chest?”

“It’s keeping me alive.”

Bucky paused. He wanted to ask, but that wasn’t what Tony needed. “It’s awful pretty for something that can be so terrifying.”

“Terrifying?” Tony asked with a raised eyebrow. “It’s a spruced up, glowing pacemaker, Buck, not a weapon.”

“You said it’s keeping you alive. If it gets taken out, then you’d die, and I’m willin’ to bet no one else on the planet could replace it.”

“Well, you’re not wrong, sweetheart.”

Bucky closed his eyes tight to try and fight back that image. “Could you try and stay safe for the next fifty years or so? At the rate you’re goin’ I’m not gonna make it another five years without gettin’ some grey hairs.”

Tony laughed, sounding raw. Bucky knew he wouldn’t sound normal for a while, but it was an amazing start. “I’ll teach you about it.” He pat Bucky’s arm. “I trust you to save me if it comes to that.”

“Thank you,” he said quietly. Then, knowing Tony needed a lighter mood, “It truly is gorgeous, kotyonok. Now we have a nightlight.”

“Is that really what you’re thinking about that right now?”

“I’m a world-class assassin; I’m always thinking ahead. On a completely unrelated note, how do you feel about having a tracking device on you at all times that JARVIS has access to?”

Tony took several, shuddering breaths and turned around in Bucky’s arms. “God I missed you.”

“Does that mean you’ll let me use one?” he asked, rubbing one of his hands up and down Tony’s back soothingly.

“Whatever you want. Really, sweetheart, anything, I’ll give it to you.”

“You already have.”

Tony sniffled. “Sap.”

“Yep. And your soulmate, so what does that say about you?”

“That I’m in love with a sap?”

Bucky kissed the top of Tony’s head, hearing helicopters in the distance. “That too. Rhodey’s almost here doll, and you’re going to let the medic look you over without complaining, and you’re going to eat and drink whatever they throw your way, okay?”

“You’ll be with me?”

“Yes.”

“Then yes.”

**Author's Note:**

> I'm on tumblr [@cami-chats](http://cami-chats.tumblr.com)


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